1. Always validate your child’s feelings and perceptions even if you do not “see” or “hear” what they do.

2. Place yourself as your child’s equal, rather than “above” your child.

3. Always explain why you are asking your child to do something so they learn and understand, rather than say: “Because I said so.”

4. Every day or evening give your child your undivided time and full attention so they feel that they are worthy by your actions.

5. Each day ask your child to share three good qualities about themselves, and validate them each day.

6. Be unconditionally supportive, without criticism, and allow your child to learn their life’s lessons, while you remain there as an unconditional support system to them.

7. NEVER insult your child, or call them a degrading name. ALWAYS separate the behavior from the child, and do not make any negative actions a part of their being. Share the more positive traits that you see in them to bring them back to their true beingness.

8. Be fully supportive of their life’s path, with unconditional love and reassurance. Let them know “I Believe in You!.”

9. When they are going through a difficult period, ask them what they think they can do, or which direction they would like to move in, rather than “tell them” what to do. This gives them the credit of being highly advanced spiritual beings and helps them to learn from their own inner knowing.

10. Be open to any “negative” critique they may have of you. They are your teachers, and you can learn much from them by taking in what they have to say, and validating where it applies. This will help you both grow closer to your Highest Self that you each agreed to become in this life.

Barbara Rose, Ph.D. most widely known as “Born To Inspire” is a best selling author and internationally recognized expert in the field of personal transformation, relationships and spiritual/human potential. A pioneering force in incorporating Higher Self Communication the study and integration of humanity’s God-Nature into modern personal growth and spiritual evolution. Her highly acclaimed books, public speaking events, tele-seminars, widely published articles, and intensives have transformed the lives of thousands across the globe. Barbara is known for providing life-changing answers, quick practical coaching and deep spiritual wisdom to people worldwide. She is the founder of IHSC - Institute of Higher Self Communication, inspire! Magazine, Rose Humanitarian Alliance.
Barbara holds a Ph.D. in Metaphysics and works in cooperation with some of the greatest spiritual leaders of our time, to uplift the spiritual consciousness of humanity. Her latest book is “Know Yourself: A Woman’s Guide to Wholeness, Radiance & Supreme Confidence”
Visit her website at http://www.borntoinspire.com

Do you know what these famous people have in common?

• Alexander Graham Bell

• George Patton

• Albert Einstein

• Benjamin Franklin

• Winston Churchill

• Agatha Christie

• George Bernard Shaw

• Will Rogers

If you guessed that they were all homeschoolers, you’d be correct. This is a very short list of famous and successful people who were educated at home. If you would like to expand this list, do a search on the Internet for ?famous homeschoolers.? There are many websites that list these people and some provide detailed biographies. There is even a book called, aptly, ?Famous Homeschoolers,? by Nancy and Malcolm Plant. (http://www.fun-books.com/specials.htm)

The point here is to get into the mindset that people can be educated and become successful adults without attending public school. And because I can almost ?hear? what you are thinking, no, it is not necessary to have a high school diploma to go to college.

So what is homeschooling? In the broadest sense, homeschooling is educating your children at home. You, as parent, become teacher. Parents homeschool for more reasons than you can imagine. Some want to avoid having their children exposed to violence and peer pressure. Some homeschool so that they can make sure their children’s education adheres to their religious beliefs. Some live a different lifestyle?perhaps they travel a lot?and want their children’s schooling to be flexible enough to fit around that life style. And some, like me, simply enjoy being with their children. They don’t want the public school to interrupt and weaken the parent/child bond that they have been working hard to create for the first five years of their child’s life.

Just as there are many reasons to homeschool, there are many methods of homeschooling. All the way from ?un-schooling? (learning by doing, learning from life, not using textbook type materials) to ?school at home? (using textbooks at desks set up in a schoolroom at home) and everything in between. It’s very easy to find hundreds of homeschool Websites by using a search engine, but just to get you started, try:

Jon’s Homeschool Resource Page http://www.midnightbeach.com/hs/

When I decided to write this article, I thought hard about what I could offer that wasn’t being displayed on thousands of Websites on the Internet. I realized that the only thing I have to offer anyone interested in homeschooling is?my experience. So everything in the article below comes from my fifteen years of experience homeschooling my four youngest children. I hope it is of some use to you.

Deciding to homeschool your child may be one of the most important decisions you ever make as a parent, and it will take a lot of thought and soul searching. To the newcomer, it may seem impossible, overwhelming and very, very lonely. But like most huge obstacles, once it’s broken down into smaller pieces, it becomes manageable. We’ll take it one step at a time, in small enough chunks to get a hold of. So, if you’re game, roll up your sleeves and let’s get to work figuring out if homeschooling is for you and your child.

First things first. Organization is the key. Get a three-ring binder (homeschooling parent’s LOVE three-ring binders) and put a label on the front. (If you’ve made the transition to digital record keeping, you can just start a folder on the computer. But it’s not as much fun.) Label it something serious, like ? My Homeschooling Plans? or ?Homeschooling Thoughts.? Put some paper in the binder, find a really comfortable ink pen, and sit down somewhere quiet.

Ready? Good. Now, let’s get started.

What are your reasons for considering homeschooling? Even if you haven’t actually made the decision to homeschool, the fact that you are here reading this article says you are curious. Perhaps you honestly don’t know the answer yet?and that’s ok. The remainder of this article is going to try to help you start to find those answers.

Homeschooling is legal in all 50 states, but each state has it’s own set of laws that must be followed. Compulsory (how I hate that word) education here in Washington State starts at the age of 8. Even though I had been homeschooling him from birth, to stay legal once my son reached 8-years old, I was required to become ?certified.? That meant I either had to have two years of college education, or take a ?certification class.? I met this requirement by taking an independent correspondence class, during which I was asked to put on paper my goals, philosophies and reasons for wanting to homeschool. I’d like to help you do the same right now.

Start a page–either the ?tree? kind or a file on the computer?and title it ?My Educational Beliefs.? List what personal beliefs you have about education?especially the education of your own children. Get as detailed as you can here–the value is in the thinking process behind the list. Take your time, I’m in no hurry.

As an example to get you started, I’m going to share with you what I wrote on my list nine years ago.

My Educational Beliefs

1. I believe my child’s attitude about learning should be:

One of continual curiosity and seeking of knowledge.

2. I believe my child’s learning should lead towards a lifestyle that is:

Rural, physically active, creative.

3. I believe these basic values should be part of my child’s learning:

• Respect for others

• Loyalty to family and friends

• Honesty

• Generosity

4. I believe children learn best:

Through hands-on learning experience, reading, workbooks.

5. I believe a teacher should:

• Provide side-by-side assistance and direction.

• Interact with the child.

• Provide the structure within which the child may explore, experiment, study and achieve.

• Provide a good example of excitement in learning.

6. Other beliefs:

I believe my child should grow up to be self-reliant and occupationally secure in a field of high interest to them.

Now, that wasn’t too bad, was it? Don’t give up on this until you have at least something written down, but don’t agonize over it either. You can come back to it later if need be. Next, start a paper or file titled ?Life Goals For My Child.?

I want you to write down what kind of person you envision your child being as an adult. What are your hopes and dreams for him/her? What educational gifts do you hope to be able to help them find that will serve them their entire lives?

I’ll share mine from 9 years ago, just to get you started.

?Life Goals for My Child?

7. Be literate.

8. Be self-reliant.

9. Compete well in their chosen field of occupation.

10. Appreciate art, music, and literature.

11. Be creative.

12. Be inventive and resourceful.

13. Be healthy, mentally and physically.

14. Co-operate with others.

15. Maintain a strong sense of self-worth.

16. Maintain a life-long curiosity, seeking knowledge as a way of life.

17. Look to the future with a sense of excitement and adventure.

For the last exercise, start a third paper titled: Why We (I) Am Going To Homeschool Our (My) Child? (Yes, single parents can successfully homeschool their children.) You may not have all the answers for this one yet either, but just get something down. All of these ideas and beliefs can start getting mixed in with other people’s opinions once we start educating ourselves in depth about homeschooling, and you’ll be glad you have these lists tucked away.

Okay, here’s my old list:

Why We Are Going To Homeschool Our Children

Our family consists of myself, my husband, a 21-year-old daughter, a 19-year-old daughter, an 8-year-old son, a 7-year-old daughter, a 4-½ year old daughter, and an unborn son due in 6 months. My two oldest daughters (from my first marriage) were in the public school system for the whole of their educational years. It is largely a dissatisfaction with the public schools and all it’s attendant problems (academic, social, and moral) that has caused us to make the decision to homeschool our youngest children. We decided, even before our 8-year-old son (the oldest of the younger set) was born, that somehow we would find an alternative to the public schools.

We want to homeschool for some additional reasons. We want added closeness with our children. We want more independence, greater control over our family’s moral and philosophical values, and better awareness of our children’s interests.

We dislike the thought of any government agency–no matter how well meaning–directing the raising of our children.

We intend to homeschool because we do not want our children’s academic, social, and moral education taken out of our hands.

We believe these areas of a child’s education are a parent’s responsibility, right, and pleasure.

I’d like you to spend some time going over these lists until you feel they accurately reflect your feelings about homeschooling your children. When I did these exercises, I had only a vague idea about why I wanted to homeschool and what kind of education I wanted to help my children acquire. These simple exercises helped me to ?solidify? my ideas and provided the basis for our future homeschooling methods. I hope they help you to do the same. Keep these lists in a safe place and add to them as you explore the possibility of homeschooling your child.

About The Author

Anita York has been homeschooling her four youngest children for the past 15 years. In addition, she teaches other homeschoolers at two resource centers, and is a contracted Senior Editor, Editor, Copyeditor and Manuscript Screener for three publishers.

Her book “You CAN Homeschool Your Child” is available from One-At-A-Time Enterprises, the business she started with her homeschoolers. Available at: http://www.L7S.net/Item.php?ID=YC000.

Her home business, EagleMountain Reading, Writing, and Research Services http://www.L7s.net/eaglemountain provides a variety of services geared towards helping beginning as well as established authors with various aspects of the writing process.

support@L7S.net

My son’s private school requires families to put in at least 10 hours of volumnteer work a year at the school.

One of the ways I like to put in my time is to chaperone some of the fields trips the class goes on.

Dodging sink holes

This month’s field trip was a four mile hike in the woods learning about sink holes.

Picture four adults and 30 fifth graders in the woods.

Unlimited mosquitoes.

Unseasonbly hot weather in November.

The biggest challenge was convincing the kids why they could not run down the slopes and get into the water in the sink hole.

Putting in the time

I heard some parents complaining today. I think they are nuts.

I had a blast because I was with my son and his friends.

Parents still believe that you can make up quantity time missed with a little quality time.

It’s a lousy myth.

This is because kids spell love T-I-M-E. Plain and simple.

The phrase putting in the time can sound like a negative thing. To me it is a privilege.

The best reward came at the end of the hike. My son came up and asked me if just he and I could come back here some day and go hiking, just the two of us.

You got it, pal.

Visit The Article Guy for more leading edge tips and tools for writing articles that bring you prospects, publicity and profits. You can also subscirbe to our monthly Article Empire Tips Newsletter. You are also invited to visit my Express-Start Article Writing Program for more information on the next article writing tele-seminar.

Part of the responsibility of being a father is to establish a strong foundation for the family. Just like a building foundation, much of this work goes unseen and rarely gets acknowledged, yet the strength and integrity of the entire structure relies on it. The following intentions, although not always perfectly fulfilled, give us guidance in our mission.

Grounded in Reality

While my children may put me on a pedestal, I have my feet firmly on the ground and acknowledge my own strengths and weaknesses.

Demonstrative Love

I take the time to know and understand the best way to communicate my love to each and every child. My children see my love for my wife clearly expressed.

Mutual Respect.

By honoring and never ridiculing the thoughts, emotions and actions of my family, each member clearly experiences and understands my great respect for them.

Consistently Predictable.

My family is comforted and anchored by my predictability. My deepest values are consistently

demonstrated in my speech and behavior.

Predictable Spontaneity.

My family knows that I am extremely curious and love to explore and learn. My spontaneity is

consistent. We plan with flexibility, and the children look forward to unexpected adventures.

Responsible.

My children see how I prepare and follow through, owning up to my responsibilities. They learn by my example.

Safety/Security

I take safety very seriously and my children know it. They have learned by my examples, for instance: I always wear a helmet when skating, skiing or bicycle riding, and I take first-aid and CPR classes. Our car does not go into motion until all seat belts, including mine, are on. Primary

Advocate

My children know that I stand behind them and will protect, defend and honor them at all times. I do not discuss my children’s failings with others.

Serious Humor

I deliberately use humor liberally to lighten stress and lubricate relationships to ensure a cohesive family.

WYSIWYG What you see is what you get.

I practice what I preach and that includes accepting human frailty and mistakes. The greatest foundation for a family is living with integrity.

Copyright 2004 by CoachVille, Dovid Grossman and Ken Mossman
Duplication, with attribution, permitted and encouraged.
www.CoachVille.com

From CoachVille’s “Awesome Dads, dare to be a hero!” community.

Check us out at: http://dbc593.cvcommunity.com

About The Author

My father was a very successful engineer. But he and I never got along, and we fought all the time. One day, when I was 17, I told him, “I always wanted a close relationship with you, but we don’t have it.” I watched as three tears squeezed out of his pained eyes. And he said, “I’ve always wanted that, too, but I just don’t know how to do it.” Since that day, we haven’t argued. I got it. I understood his love for me was really deep. A lot of fathers are in the same boat. They love their kids dearly. But they don’t know how to express this in a way that their kids understand it. Which means there’s great pain in one of the most important relationships in their lives. I offer adventure, mentoring and coaching programs for fathers to become Awesome Dads. The benefits are a lifetime of pleasure and pride with the most important people in their lives. Dovid Grossman

coach@dovidgrossman.com

When I finally decided to get married, it was the greatest moment in my life. My wife had two children from a previous marriage. We dated for a entire year before getting married and I never questioned her style of parenting. I had no children at the time. My thoughts at the were, if a person has small children, obviously they knew much more about parent than I did. A few months into the marriage, I long discovered that my wife’s children needed a new direction very badly.

Her children took advantage of our different styles of parenting. If I said no, my wife would tell them yes. And they would actually be laughing at the both of us. Because to them, the adults could not find common ground. My wife would award her children for not doing their school work, she would reward them for not cleaning their rooms, she would reward them for bringing home bad grades from school,and she would reward them for being disrespectful.

I was very different from my wife, I would not reward them for doing wrong when I knew they were both capable of doing the right thing. Therefore, I implimented an discipline regiment into the household. For the kids and sometimes, even my wife.I found out that is was not their fault, it was their mother’s.I wanted them to start cleaning up their rooms, keeping their hands of things that didn’t belong to them, and to respect adults.

As mentioned, I would tell them the right things that they should do and she would tell them not to do it. Everything that I would try to do for those kids, my wife would undercut it. It almost seemed like that she wanted her own children to fail. They were not bad children at all, they were not getting the upbringing they needed to function in society. And when I tried to help her kids with everything they needed to be helped with, she got angry with me.

The children were starting to play me against their mother. And she knew that and accepted it. We soon separated and she filed for divorced. Our different parenting styles ended a marriage. All because my wife wanted her children to fail with no intervention from anyone.

By having complete different parenting styles, we were sending mix messages to the children, and in my opinion it had proved destructive to the kids. I did not check out my wife’s parenting style before I had married her. So Therefore, I might blame myself for some of this.

I have learned that parents should be on the same page when it comes to their children. In traditional times, the mother was always seemed at the one time to be the most lenient when it came to discipline and the dad was a bit tougher. And that was reason to why most young children always ran to their mother more than dad when they got into trouble.

Children can become confused, to which adult to look up too, especially in a time of emotional meltdowns. There should be an equal ground when it comes to young children, They must learn real responibility. And as they grow older and enter society, they will look back on the parent who told them to study hard and you will make something out of yourself, than the parent who rewarded them for doing the wrong thing.

copyright 2006

contact me: Gwilder40@hotmail.com
www.freewebs.com/gwilder

I live in chicage with my six year old son. I have written several articles, some short stories, and I have a book that has been published. I wrote for the Chicago Defender for a time. I’m a stay-at-home dad at the writing of this.