Back about 1970 there was a popular song by Bobby Sherman on the radio that included the lyric, “I gotta be more than just to lines in the Oklahoma City Times.” While the tune is catchy and the words poke fun of the obituary section of a great newspaper, it carries a serious message to those us interested in genealogy.

Anyone who studies family history knows how difficult it is to visualize the lives of our parents when they were young, our grandparents before they moved west in a covered wagon, or great grandparents that we never knew. Beyond two generations we can usually only pick up hints of what their lives were like through birth certificates, marriage licenses, obituaries, and other tracks that they left while alive.

These are wonderful bits of information that fill in dates, locations, and some of the cold facts of their lives but tell very little about what made them human. What were they passionate about? Were they funny? What makes them special? Did they love small children and dogs? Did they make a difference in other people’s lives?

The answer to these and other questions is usually within our grasp. Here are some good places to start. While you may not remember your grandparents, older members of your family might remember and their memories are yours for the asking. If you don’t have anyone older in your immediate family, expand your thinking to include cousins, aunts and uncles, second cousins until you find someone at least a few years older than you. Arrange to meet with them in person or by telephone to talk about your family.

It helps to prepare for the discussion with a few props and discussion ideas. There are some good discussion guides online that will help you get started with the most basic information like names, dates, locations, and relationships. You should also ask more open-ended questions like, “What do you remember about [grandma] when she was young? What was her personality like? Is their a particular event or occasion that stands out in your mind that demonstrates her personality? What are the things that she loved to do? What do you remember about daily life at [grandma's] house? What do you remember about going there? Were there any things that she did as a tradition during the holidays or at special times of the year?

It also helps to take along any photos or documents that you have to help guide the conversation and stimulate the memories. Who is this person in the picture? What do you remember about them?

Include your children, grandchildren, nieces, and nephews in the conversation. Older people love to tell stories to children. My wife once gave an assignment to her fourth-grade class to interview people at the retirement home about their lives. They came up with some amazing stories that were written down and presented to the person’s relatives as a keepsake.

You should also check for any media items that might help you understand. Do you have any photographs, movies, or recordings of [grandma] that might help me get to know her better? Is it okay if I copy these?

Most people have a few events that stand out in their minds and you should let the conversation go where they want it to go. Record the conversation and take notes just in case the recorder doesn’t work. Take some pictures yourself just to document the occasion.

Finally, get a good software program that tracks not only cold facts but allows you to organize and show off your media - recordings, photos, movies. Share your information with family members and the world by posting it on a web site where relatives will find you and give you even more information.

Your family can be more than just two lines in the Oklahoma City Times. Through your effort their lives can continue to make a positive difference in the world.

Parents are in a unique position to “monitor” their children’s internet activities and to observe their behavior with respect to any actions generated by the child’s internet use. If children are hiding something from a parent, usually an astute parent will sense that something is askew… in these times it may well be internet associated. This is a delicate balance of empowerment and trust. And it is a wise parent that verbalizes this balance and discusses it openly with the child, especially teen age children.

The internet is a powerful tool for schoolwork and knowledge. It is, at the same time, a significant danger, offering pornography to underage children and the real danger of a personal contact with an undesirable internet “friend.”

Here are some ways that a parent can thwart the jeopardy:

1. The computer needs to be in a family room, not in the child’s bedroom.

2. Parents should get computer smart and learn how the internet functions.

3. Be aware of your child’s use of the computer.

4. Ask your children about their online friends.

5. Obtain programs that will block undesirable, “adult” sites.

6. Pedophiles use teen and preteen chat rooms to prey on children. Do not let your child enter any personal information in a chat environment. Chat rooms allow for one on one conversations… do not permit your children to engage in such conversations.

7. Be sure your child reports anything unusual that they observe on the internet, and, certainly never to answer any rude or offensive e-mails or messages.

8. Be sure your child knows that it is very dangerous to actually meet anyone that they have talked with on the internet.

9. Do not allow your child to send or receive any pictures on the internet from anyone not personally known to you.

10. Do not allow your child any “late night” sessions on the internet.

There are many jeopardies in which children can be trapped. Many are discussed in a new book by Dr. Stuart J. Malkin, “Empowering Children.” More information at: http://www.buybooksontheweb.com/description.asp?ISBN=0-7414-2331-6

Dr. Malkin holds a B.Sc. in Business and a Masters and Ph.D. in Religion. He has made hundreds of visits to schools with a moving and effective motivational presentation, urging teens to do their personal best. His mentoring programs have empowered many, many children. His quest for years has been to teach the power of Right Action, working towards the goal of a better world.

In 1985 my grandmother passed away. As my sisters and I sorted through and organized her photos and her photo albums, I was suddenly struck by the realization that I didn’t know all that much about my grandparents and their history. When I was a child I would listen curiously as my aunts and grandma talked about the “old country” and always found myself wondering where the “old country” was.

Here were pictures of people and events that were not “documented”, no dates, no names; nothing. That was the beginning of my passion for the past. How about you, are you interested in preserving your family’s history?

Old Documents and Photos tell a Story

Do you have any old photographs or documents, perhaps from your grand-parents, or great-grandparents? Birth certificates and immigration and naturalization papers, blood donor certificates, marriage certificates are all a wonderful source of history and stories.

When I first discovered this untapped resource in my own family it was a little overwhelming, here were all these documents, with the most precious of all, a certificate to my grandparents, in recognition for their contribution to Alberta’s heritage; signed by the Premier Peter Lougheed, and it took me a long time learn how to organize and store all this information.

I have always been interested in the lives of “ordinary” people because there is so much reality and beauty folded into a person’s lifetime. As I looked at these old photos of my ancestors, I noticed the clothes that they wore, the hairstyles, the weathered and rugged lines on their faces, and I wondered about their “story”. I realized then that my grandparents and great-grandparents wrote the history of our small corner of the world.

With a tremendous amount of assistance by my mother, the task of organizing and putting facts to the photos was completed. Then I began scanning all the photographs and storing them on CD’s. Around this same time I had joined a free genealogy hosting site where I set up my first website that I called “Grandma’s Album”.

The interest in my website grew, and so did my passion for writing about my ancestors lives.

Take Time!

Now, it was more than just the photographs that intrigued me, it was the need to know my ancestors life stories that urged me on. I had now learned that once a loved one is gone their memories and stories are usually gone too.

In 2001 I sensed that I needed to set some goals, and one of these goals was to see my paternal grandfather with the purpose of getting his life story. His immigration to Canada from the Netherlands in 1950 represented another era of my family history that begged to be explored. Life in the Netherlands during the German occupation was horrible; I knew that my great-grandmother had tuberculosis and had died of starvation in the sanitarium when the Germans boarded it up; I wanted to know more about my grandfather’s escape from the Germans and of his voyage to Canada, this is a story that will someday be told. My mission to see my grandfather again was fulfilled, however, getting his story was not, and he died just 2 months after my visit. Perhaps I can derive some of his story from my father or my aunt, but I will never get my grandfather’s perspective, that opportunity is lost. And on that same note - don’t wait too long to reach out to other family members, in my own experience if you wait too long they may be gone by the time you get around to it.

Move the Universe!

I began collecting my relative’s memories and stories; I did personal interviews where I tape recorded them answering specific questions about their childhood memories; school years, family, the houses they grew up in, etc. and then would go home and transcribe them onto my computer. (And I didn’t have a transcription machine either! I would listen to one sentence at a time, stop the machine, and type like crazy!)

I was so busy writing stories at this time about my grandfather’s journey to Canada, and interviewing my great-aunt about her childhood, and really enjoying it, that when I decided to submit my first article to our community newsletter I froze. I still remember standing at the mailbox holding the brown envelope over the slot thinking, “as soon as I drop this in there, the decision has been made, there is no turning back, I have moved the universe.”

And move the universe I did! My first article was scooped immediately and after a meeting at the local coffee shop with the editor of the newsletter I was offered my own column.

Build a Website

A website can be been very successful; also very busy and challenging. I had to learn how to use FrontPage for the web design, and learn about meta tags, keywords, and search engines, but it has been worth the effort. I send out a family newsletter that updates everyone on any new changes or additions that I have made to the website, I announce birthdays, anniversaries, and new photo’s and stories, and just in the last month I have been discovered by a “missing branch” from the family tree. My readers are from all over the world; Germany, Netherlands, Australia, and the U.S.A.
Much of the content on my website consists of contributions of photographs, memoirs, and genealogy from family near and far, but my favorite parts of the website are the memoirs and stories.

You Can Write Personal History

With 2005 being the 100th birthday of Alberta, what better time than now to look for those old photos of grandma and grandpa, or sit down with them and listen to their story, like I did with my great aunt and my mother. There is an abundance of stories just waiting to be told.

You too, can write about your ancestors or other family members; or even yourself. The accomplishment will someday be appreciated by your children and grandchildren, or even your great-grandchildren, as I have found to be true.

Salon visits can be scary experiences for small children: They are boring, full of strangers and strange smelling products, you are being ordered to sit still for ages, whilst some idiot is doing terrible things to your hair which you didn’t want to happen in the first place. Life is sooo unfair!

So how do you as a parent, avoid, annoying the stylist, upsetting your child and getting yourself stressed? Well this is where your best child psychology skills come into play! Sometimes your child will have unwarranted fears and you have to help to overcome them. Creating trust by taking their concerns seriously is the first and most important step. Promising a treat can also help. Best of all is to check in your local area to see if there is one of the growing number of new specialized children’s salons available. Salon chains like Cartoon Cuts are designed to make the hair cut experience more positive and entertaining for small children: toys, video games, specially shaped chairs and specially-trained stylists, all help to ensue the experience is more like going to a theme park rather than a visit to the doctor.

Home Sweet Home

However, if your child is afraid of the hairdresser’s, then try to cut their hair at home. They will feel safe and comfortable and you will save time and money. You can do it yourself if you have the skills - or the bravery. Cutting hair for a child is basically the same for an adult, except that a child’s hair is usually thin and baby soft. Keep the bangs approx. 1/2″ from the eyebrows. If the child’s hair is thin, avoid short cuts for now until their hair comes in thicker. Shape around the face if you’re trying to grow it long. If you don’t have any haircutting experience, you might want to seek out a step by step guide on children’s hair cutting, or get someone to do it for you.

Putting on the Style

Whatever you do, remember that today’s media-savvy, celebrity-crazy kids want to look good. Children start to take an interest in their own hair style from an early age; even the kindergarten set want to be in-style. They want their hair to be like their best friend or even a television character. Boys that used to be seen only in ball caps are now having their hair bleached and highlighted.

Finding the right hair style for a child is usually about finding a cool, fun, and easy-to-manage child hair style that suits your youngster’s active lifestyle. But you may experience resistance - as children get older they start to have very definite opinions of how they want to wear their hair. This hairstyle preference will surface in early childhood and continue throughout the teen years and into adulthood. Many a growing child will argue with their parents over how they want to wear their hair to school. At this stage of development the hair becomes a major identity factor.

Hair Care 101

The key is to be encouraging; as children start to take an interest in their own hair and how they style it, this is the time to encourage them to follow an entire regime of good hair hygiene practices. It is important to show a child (when they are willing), how to properly shampoo and rinse their own hair. You can also teach them about towel blotting, detangling, combing and brushing their hair. Help them build a good hair hygiene schedule so that they learn the importance of keeping their hair clean and neat. Try also to get them to develop good eating habits because healthy hair is very dependent on high quality carbohydrates and plenty of fresh fruit and vegetables. Good nutrition will promote shine and condition at any age.

Tips for Tip-Top Hair

Washing - use a mild shampoo, preferably in the child’s favorite color or scent. Sometimes children are more willing to wash their hair with a fun shampoo, especially if it doesn’t sting their eyes.

Combing/brushing - try to create trust and reassurance by allowing them to comb and brush their own hair on their own terms. Do not brush your child’s hair 100 strokes before bedtime in the traditional manner - this will over stimulate the sebaceous glands and make the hair greasy and heavy. Doing a quick brush to get the tangles out should be sufficient. Combing the hair will promote shine and condition. Remember to use a comb on wet hair rather than a brush or you risk creating static electricity, which leads to breakage.

Accessories - give your child high quality combs and brushes and teach them the proper way to care for their hair to instill good grooming habits that will last a lifetime. Purchase some “hair friendly” clips and hair ties to help a child keep their hair off their face, and reduce the chance of tangling or matting. Stay away from any hairclips with sharp teeth, because they can cut into the hair and cause potential hair damage.

Tangles - all parents know that dealing with tangles is a nightmare for both parent and child. Here’s how to reduce the trauma of removing tangles:

1. Hold the section of hair you’re trying to comb out.

2. Hold it taut so the child won’t feel you ripping through the ends.
3. Spray a good leave-in detangler on the knot.

4. You can also comb conditioner in while the child’s hair is still wet. Children need conditioner too (avoid heavy types and stick with conditioners that are specifically called “light” conditioners).

References:

1. Children’s Hair, www.Styles101.com
2. Child Hair Style and Hair Care Tips, Short-hair-styles.com
3. Lets Talk Kids Hair, Lynne Chapman http://www.BellaOnline.com

Michael Barrows is a web publisher specialing in niche marketing. Pick up his FREE ebook “(Nearly) Everything You Should Know ABout Hairstyles and Hair Care” at his website; http://www.great-hairstyles.com

As a parent it is sometimes hard to not be able to always buy your child the next new thing that usually costs a lot of money. Sometimes it just isn’t feasible and you also probably can’t make sense of spending upwards of $50 or more on one video game! A video game that will become obsolete in just a few months and your child will forget he even has it in his closet!

We have a solution to help keep your budget inline, your kids happy and yourself happy as well. Sounds too good to be true I know, but it is! You can now rent games online and have them sent to your door. This is a great program for many reasons. One - you don’t have to remember to return them, or to wait in line to check them out. Two - there is a flat monthly fee that is two thirds cheaper than buying a new game in the store. Three - Undoubtedly your child will get sick of the game but now you can return it and rent other, no money wasted.

I don’t know about you but when I find a way to keep my budget intact and my kids happy while also being able to give them some of the things they really want, it’s a good thing. When I rent games online it is an all over time saver for me since they are on the door step when I get home for work. For now, I think I will keep this service it’s worth every penny and them some.

Did I also mention that my husband and I also enjoy playing these same games? It makes for spending some time with the family and kids while not having to spend a small fortune.